PRAYERS ANSWERED..THANK YOU!

Thank you to my co-bloggers that “liked” my prayer request..your action drove others to read my post & in a situation like this there can never be too many prayers.

I finally received an update last night that my friends’ Dad is actually home from the hospital & recovering well! Do you have any idea what a miracle that is? You do if you know anyone that’s suffered a stroke, especially the sudden fatal ones that rip a loved one away from you out of nowhere, perfectly fine one minute, physically gone forever mere minutes later. I’ve always believed in the power of prayer, and I thank you from my heart for yours..God hears every prayer, even the silent ones. He loves us all that much.

You saw in my prayer request that I’m a 3 time stroke survivor. I will address the many reasons behind these events in the future, as every moment of our lives are intertwined & cannot be explained in a few sentences.

I’ll never forget my first mini-stroke, called a TIA, tranischemic attack. It was a very hot summer day, and I was home alone as full-time Mom with Noah, nearing his 1st birthday.

I went outside to fill up the small plastic pool that’s just perfect for us both to play & splash in, cool off together. I had the back door open to always keep Noah in my sight even though he was happily busy cooing & laughing in his Exersaucer, perfectly safe and content. Moms receive the fierce instinct to protect their children the moment the pregnancy test shows you’re pregnant. It never leaves, it only grows deeper as time passes & never goes away.

I was filling the small pool when the first wave of dizziness & nausea hit. I ignored it, assumed it was the heat. It didn’t take long to fill the pool, but as those few minutes passed, one eye remaining on Noah, I felt a numbness strike the entire right side of my body, from my right eye all the way down my right arm, leg & foot. The vision in my right eye was blurry & I knew immediately something was very wrong.

The 5 steps from the pool on the patio to the opened door seemed to get farther away as I stumbled towards that door. I was no longer able to think clearly, my brain a complete fog, my heart pounding in my chest, feeling like I couldn’t get air in my lungs. I didn’t have the ability to feel fear or any emotion, because all that mattered to me in these minutes was somehow lifting Noah out of the Exersaucer, unable to use my right arm at all, get him to his crib for safety on the complete opposite end of the house, and having the phone with me to call for help.
I didn’t know what was happening, but I knew it was serious & I had to protect my baby.

I don’t remember how I managed to carry Noah to his crib, baby monitors placed all over the house strategically to hear every peep. I can say with certainty the guardian angels God sent helped me get him there, because my right leg wasn’t moving, I was dragging it behind me, big heavy happy baby & phone clutched as close to my chest using my left arm as tightly as possible, afraid I was going to drop Noah. I didn’t & got him to his crib, such a relief!

I called 911 as soon as I knew my son was safe. The police arrived in moments, and by then I was unable to talk. I was trapped in my body, unable to communicate, completely helpless & finally filled with fear that filled every fiber of my being. Who was going to take care of Noah? My husband was travelling, a salesman driving many miles weekly & was not close by that day. I survived a life-threatening pregnancy with Noah, would God really be so cruel to take me away from my son now, after everything we went through to be granted the miracle of his birth, big & healthy against all odds? Right before his birthday? No. I refused to believe that.

The police kept asking questions but my mouth wouldn’t work. I could hear them, I could see the words I wanted to say but they were stuck, jumbled. I could hear the sirens of the ambulance coming near & that’s when Noah began crying & screaming “Mommommommom here”, over & over. One of the policeman was a grandfather, & assured me he’d stay, take care of Noah until a family member arrived. My last full memory was the flooding of relief that Noah was safe. I woke up in the cardiac trauma unit in the ER later.

I underwent a battery of testing, an MRI didn’t show an active bleed anywhere in my brain or a blood clot/aneurysm, all excellent news. My ability to speak had returned, mind clear, numbness on right side of body gone but I felt confused, disoriented. I had not received any drugs to sedate me, only ones to bring down my blood pressure.

I am prone to forming blood clots due to a rare disorder I’ve had since a child. It
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Keep an Attitude of Gratitude!

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For all of us dealing with now downgraded Hurricane Sandy up & down the Eastern seaboard, remember this: things can be replaced, but people can’t. It’s awful to lose your car, home, belongings of priceless sentimental value, like pictures of loved ones. It’s overwhelming waiting days to get power restored, pump the water out of your flooded basement, waiting for insurance adjusters to cut you a check. You can be cold, hungry & temporarily staying in a shelter, relatives’ home or friends’ place. It’s stressful, sad, scary, uncertain as we are creatures of habit & familiarity. This time will pass, life will return to whatever your “normal” is..but the loss of a loved one can never be replaced. Look around you, be grateful that everyone you love is safe & unharmed. If you’re loved ones are in different locations, now is the perfect time to call them & say, I love you, have been thinking of you, I’m glad you’re safe. Decide to have an Attitude of Gratitude no matter what your circumstances are today. Love knows no distance. Peace, ~Jennifer~

URGENT PRAYER REQUEST

Dear world, I’m asking for everyone to stop for a moment and pray for one of my dear friends’ Dad, who suffered a stroke around 4:15 pm EST.
“Dear God, Almighty Father, I ask you boldly in Jesus’ name for your Divine intervention on my friends’ beloved Dad. Please send your mercy & guidance to all medical personnel responsible for his care, and wrap Your loving arms around this family in their time of need. Give them all of your love and support, discernment for treatment & faith that You are indeed with all of them right now. If there is any help I can give this family as a 3 time stroke survivor, You know I am ready to do so at any time should it be Your will.
In Jesus’ name I fervently pray. Amen”

Thank you for praying for this wonderful, loving family.

All my love,
Jennifer

Strangers Disguised As Blessings

“People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.”

This quote is something that I have always been a firm believer in…that people are placed in our lives for a specific reason. It could be anybody…a stranger you pass in the store as you nearly miss slamming your respective shopping carts into one another that can result in either a confrontation of anger or a small conversation of mutual apologies, smiles & wishing one another a great day. There’s 2 distinct messages here in this reblog: what you do with the experience of the people sent into your life & how you view or react to the experience, the person, itself.

I love people. I love using my height to always help an elderly person trying to reach a product from the top shelf..the gratitude, the relief, the feeling you get knowing that such a small gesture actually had a positive impact on that persons’ day is such a feeling of warmth, of love. You walk away feeling good about yourself, your mind has stopped racing at the pace of your grocery cart to get the dreaded task done as quickly as possible, while thinking ahead to all of the rest of the minutaie awaiting your to-do list for the day. It forces you to slow down, take off your blinders of living in your own world and engage in this thing we call humanity…what many take for granted when just as many would kill to have the ability to even grocery shop themselves, let alone drive to get there and all the steps required in completing this necessary task. We must eat, yes? I feel like I live at my local grocery store, but even if I’m pressed for time, I always do the following while I’m there…

I park my car by the nearest cart return, so it’s easy for me to always place my cart where it belongs, not shoving it into the nearest empty spot (or most likely, the car parked next to yours). On my way into the store and on my way out, I scan the parking lot for customers, especially the handicapped or elderly, that look like they could use some assistance putting their groceries in their car or needing their empty cart returned. It doesn’t take more than a few minutes to do this, and see, the simple fact that you stopped & asked if help was needed is usually accepted with gratitude. I say usually because I’ve had instances where my offer was turned down in anger, but that is what that person is feeling, not I, and it doesn’t stop me from offering the next time. That person is having a bad day, but at some point, they will remember the stranger that stopped to help them..it’s a ripple effect, like skipping a stone across a pond.

I can be just as frantic, just as stressed, just as hurried & focused at the grocery store as the next person, but I force myself to breathe, slow down & trust that no matter what delays occur due to helping someone, I’ll still get home in time to greet my son at the door every day after school, my top priority. I know this will happen because I have faith & confidence that it will happen, and I proceed accordingly.

I always seem to pick the check-out register that’s moving the slowest. A year ago, that would tick me off so bad that I would be the customer everyone else waiting gets angry at..big loud sighs, stamping my foot impatiently, getting increasingly annoyed as each minute dragged by incessantly. What did that do? It wasted my time, my energy and it put me in a bad mood. Why bother doing that to yourself for something that is beyond your control? The question I always ask myself is this:  in 5 years, 10 years, does this specific moment really matter in my life? The majority of the time the answer is a quick, resounding NOOO!! The rare occasions, such as pondering a major life-changing decision, if the answer is YES, I immediately draw back to think it through. I use my mind to weigh the pros & cons, but the final decision, always, comes from my heart. Some of these decisions, like ending my marriage, took years to not only implement but to accept as the inevitable. Yet once that particular decision was made, I knew immediately it was the right decision for me, because I felt relief, a weight lifted off my shoulders. I’ll address that topic another time and many others in the future, I’m sure.

I have met so many amazing people over the course of my life, moreso since I made a decision to not live by emotion, where every action causes a reaction. This decision has been a great blessing to me, has allowed people into my life on diffferent levels for whatever reason they were placed in my path. Technology of course is a great tool, if used with the proper intent, to meet great people, such as Facebook. I have a solid, personal relationship with almost every person on my Friends List, many whom I’ve never physically met due to geographic location, but due to common interests we forged a bond on a personal level. I’ve had the joy of re-connecting with childhood friends I haven’t seen in 30 years, friends from high school, my extended family that’s spread across the globe.. establishing friendships from mutual friends. I’m not searching for quantity, I’m searching for quality and I am truly surrounded by a group of loving, generous, supportive people.

I’ve had people come & go in my life, and I am certain this will continue, because it is meant to be that way for all of us. Think of all the opportunities you may have missed over the years because you instantly judged someone you don’t even know, dismissed them immediately, slammed the door shut & locked out any chance of that person coming into your life to fulfill their purpose! You’ll never know what you missed by reacting out of your conditioned emotions & personality.

Take a chance, open your heart, open the door to those who appear in your life. They have appeared for a reason, just as you have appeared in their lives for possibly the same reason or any realm of possibility. You have no control over the length of time this person is to stay in your life and vice versa, but there is definitely a reason your paths have crossed. It’s all about love, really. Love others more than yourself..not at your expense, but as human beings. Choose to love. I guarantee it will continually change your life for the better!

Peace, ~Jennifer~

Hello world!

Welcome to mine! I have so much to say, so much to share, it is long past due that I realize my dream of becoming a writer…my true passion. I was always writing, keeping diaries as a young girl, and continued keeping diaries or journals through junior high, high school and college. The entries became more scarce as I entered the bewildering yet exciting world called “life” and “adult” and “professional”, “accountant”…oh, the many labels we put on ourselves, and allow the world to put on ourselves as well! Why do we allow that to happen? It happens automatically as we grow older, as young children entering school learn how to socialize, interact with others outside of the safety net of their home. How we view ourselves is how we enable others to label us. I knew since I was a young child that I was different, a keen intuition, filled with hopes and dreams and I did not want to be part of any particular “crowd” or click in high school and college. I stood out physically but never was able to truly, fully connect with the gifts I had waiting inside of me..my Divine purpose for being put on this place we call Earth.

I have come full circle, have experienced monumental change, adversity and growth especially within the past 14 months. I know why I am here on Earth, what I am supposed to be doing, what my purpose is…do you know yours? The earlier in Life you can grab this, hold onto it & make it your own, the more fulfilling your life will be in every possible facet. Walk with me, learn from me, open your heart to what I have to say..if any of my words here touch just one person, help just one person, then I am accomplishing & living my destiny:  loving & helping others..all people, animals, causes, beliefs, sunrises & sunsets, the ocean, the mountains, the dew on the grass in early morning. You can change your life by changing your outlook & your attitude. You can not only survive, but THRIVE through sickness, financial distress, family problems, divorce..anything that is considered adversity.

I look forward to opening my heart to yours, to sharing the wisdom I’ve acquired and to never, ever stop learning something new each and every day. Take the ordinary & make it extraordinary. Live your life to it’s fullest..it is indeed true we are only given one life to live. Let’s make the most of, together.

Love & Light, Jennifer